wow-long time, short post

Good night.

I have not written in a very long time. I apologize for this and will try once again to make it at least a weekly thing. It has been crazy busy with midterms the past couple weeks and it looks like it will only get crazier in the near future. Oh well, I guess that is what I signed up for. I suppose the horrendous busyness is a good way to teach me to say no to things. For me this is a hard learned lesson, but one I am learning and that I know I will be thankful for in the long run. This is an opportunity to learn what self-care looks like in the midst of chaos. You know, it is kind of silly but the ELCA has this spiritual wholeness wheel that I have been trying to live by the past week or so. Last week was my synod's candidacy retreat and we spent a good deal of time talking about the wheel which has six parts: Physical, social, emotional, intellectual, vocational, and financial. Running through all of these is spiritual wellbeing. Now, I normally think stuff like this is ridiculous, but after just a few weeks of seminary, it is clear that so many church folk need to learn to better care for themselves.

I tell you that to tell you this: today was my first day at my teaching parish. This is a program where seminarians become a part of a single church body in the area. My context is a mission congregation called Jacob's Well. I feel like this is going to be a great fit and it will certainly get me started on my focus on mission and emerging ministries. Today's message was about economic justice and freedom (obviously, being Reformation day, this is not a "regular" Lutheran church). It really made me question my relationship with money which is something that I think about a lot. The question always bothers me: is it ok to still have plenty of money and just give, save, and spend it well or are we called to poverty? This is probably the question I struggle with the most. Jacob's Well today made one of the first decent cases I have ever heard for the first option of stewardship. You can check out their website for more info on the link above. Also, when you get a chance, look at this site. Talk to you soon.

Tim

consolation/desolation

Consolation and desolation are two terms used in the Ignatian practice: examen. As far as I understand it, consolation and desolation are the things that enrich our lives and the things that cause us sorrow or trouble. The examen is a practice of reflecting on these two parts of life. While I am not too clear on the practice, I would like to operate in this frame as I consider those things that have been consoling and those that have been desolating in my experience with transitioning to seminary thus far.

Consolation: Community is everywhere, if you look for it. Grad school is quite different than undergrad as they do not have very many synthetic community activities. Yet, one gets very close one's neighbors at an alarming rate when those people memorize the qal paradigm together in Hebrew. People seek each other out for help. We work together and not in competition. This was hard at first, but now I really appreciate it. In short, people study together, and that leads to praying together (at first desperately for help with the qal paradigm). Community is very close.

Desolation: The most difficult and hindering part of seminary thus far has been time. It is so important to be able to manage time here. I figured that it would be simple since I just came from undergrad. I could just operate on the same work schedule and all would be well in my little educational universe. Oh crap, was I ever wrong. Classes are set up in blocks. In other words, most classes meet once every week for 3 hours at a time. This gets real tricky when trying to figure out when to do what. Instead of nice little chunks of work and frequent evaluations (I feel like Lisa) we have rare papers and tests and large, undivided reading assignments. Be warned. Buy a big planner.

Desolation part two: We are forced to journal. I hate journaling. But I'm kind of a big baby.

These will do for now, but I am sure you will hear more. Maybe I'll do it weekly. Who knows. Let me know if you have any questions.

Tim

PS A decent book on EXAMEN is sleeping with bread by Three people named Linn. It is a picture book so not a big time commitment. God knows we don't have any time. Check it out.

the business of the church

Let me begin by explaining that we M Div first years (juniors) have the "extra curricular" assignment for which we find a "teaching congregation" at which we work 10-12 hours every month. I am really quite excited for this project as it is a great way to understand better the life of the parish and a chance to directly move from the ideas discussed in the classroom into the practice of those ideas in the parish. Still, I am a little irked by the way in which the assignment is to be carried out. And my discomfort has to do with the wider practices of the faithful in our American context.

Here is a journal entry for my education course from earlier today:

This revamped form of the teaching parish is, for me, still in the "church shopping" phase. I visit new churches every week as a sojourner to find one that fits. I am torn over whether this is a good method. While we do need o be in congregations that fit and challenge us, a part of me is very uncomfortable with church shopping. It seems ideal to me to have a community parish where one's whole community meets to worship and live life together. But I understand (especially after reading God is Back) that this has never really been a part of our nation's ecclesial landscape. Voluntarism is a part of our faith. I am also made uncomfortable by the language that is directly taken from capitalism. This model is so marketing and business like. It smacks of competition. We must sell our message to the public and the group with the best sales pitch, and who presents the shiniest version of the product gets the customers. The reality of our context is that this tends to be true. Even the emerging church, which I tend to hold up, presents the gospel in a way that is designed to be attractive, ready to consume, and, dare I say, trendy. New monastics-those so ardently opposed to consumer culture-even market their message (see the sales numbers of Claiborne's books).

Now, I wonder, is this a part of the nature of religion, which needs people in order to survive? Or, as a people so shaped by the Wealth of Nations, is this an especially American or post/late-modern phenomenon? Can evangelism be done without the use of micro-economic language that makes the capitalist model its normative framework?

oh yeah, the purpose of this blog

Ok, I wanted to do this in the beginning buy forgot. I just wanted to be clear that this blog is intended to keep me in touch with my various home and supporting congregations, to offer reflections, and to offer insights to those who are considering seminary. So, seriously, if you are considering and have questions that I don't address about anything in the process, from candidacy to admissions, to everyday life, let me know. Most of you have access to my email address. just let me know. ok. Sleepytime. I will write again in about a week.

Tim

well settled in but still getting used to it

As I come to the last day of the first week of classes, I have a lot on my mind. From technical and monetary issues, to juggling social, academic, and spiritual life (complicated by the fact that they are all intertwined), to reflections on the topic of today's chapel. I suppose I am doing what we all are doing: figuring life out while we go along, with an eye toward a hopeful future.

First week, our orientation week, was very helpful. A surprising amount of information was given to us (Luther has some great resources to help students in every aspect of life). I say surprising because most older students complained of first week being very superficial and pointless. Well, it certainly wasn't pointless as I actually know with whom I need to speak when a variety of questions arise, and it most definitely wasn't superficial as we spent the week delving into relevant topics with other students and faculty facilitators. I met a great group of students in my immigration study group who are now becoming my close friends. We also got to experience the cities in a unique way: we spent time at the WAM's Somali photography exhibit, with Lutheran social services, at local global vendors, and in conversation with immigrants and fellow students about God's call to care for the outsider. God really has been opening to me the centrality of community and how our truth and worldview is shaped by our contexts.

Pippi is doing well at her new school and I get to see her ever weekend and maybe one evening during the work week. This weekend we are probably taking our engagement pics with Steve. It will be wonderful when her 6 week gig is up and she can focus on the princess stuff. She is very excited about that.

Classes have been wonderful and disappointing. Some of the classes are challenging and have brought out great conversations about the shape of the Church in our world. (In fact, I think I am going to pick up an emphasis in Congregation and Missional leadership because of one of my classes). Others have been stagnant and frankly boring. There are a few unfortunate times when I feel that Wartburg was more challenging, but I am sure that things will change as the semester goes on. Hebrew takes up most of my time right now, which is great. I love language learning and have never gotten to study a language with such vastly different characters.

A quick reflection: Today's chapel speaker brought up a couple of questions that I think we would do well to ponder. The first was, "What makes us angry?" Reflection upon this can reveal our passions. The second was, "What is our withered hand?" What is that which we are embarrassed to stretch out before our neighbors? And the third was, "What is our nation's withered hand?" Is it putting economic bottom lines before the health of our neighbor? Racism? Jingoism? Xenophobia? Economic violence? Violence against women? Violence against the unborn? Or maybe against those who perform abortions? Greed? The need to always be progressing and growing? Intolerance? Hunger? Wars of terror?

To paraphrase Dr. Jones, let us howl against these things.

Tim